Saturday, June 20, 2015

Risk Tater

My daughter and I were tooling around Columbia today and we happened to be passed by this car with an interesting vanity plate.  I'm calling it interesting, and I promise I'm not making fun here, because I'm guessing the message he wants is not what he ended up with, unless he has a good sense of humor.  The plate reads:  RSK T8R.  I think the intent is to say, "Risk Taker," but what I'm seeing is, "Risk Tater."  Maybe he's describing how much he loves French Fries, or tater tots.  Maybe he's thumbing his knows at his cholesterol.  I don't know.  I just know I got a kick out of it.

"Risk Tater?"

I'm in need of a new suit.  My cousin is getting married next weekend, and it's the first wedding I've attending in about eight years.  I have plenty of sport coats, but not a suit.  I've put on a few pounds in the last eight years, so I went out hunting for a new one.  I want something nice, but I don't want to spend a lot on something I really won't use very much.  So we went out to the Mall.

The Mall was crowded today!  It's the start of Summer Break, yet everyone is inside shopping.  What's the deal?  Parking was next to impossible to find, though I finally found a bunch of spots near the Little Patuxent Parkway entrance, near the Whole Foods, and within shouting distance of the JC Penney's.  Then I started hunting.

I'm a tall guy, but not exceedingly tall, nor am I extra wide.  I'd like to think that my sizes aren't too unusual, but, to my surprise, I could not find my sizes anywhere.  I found lots of sizes very close to mine, but not quite there.  When it comes to a suit, you really can't compromise without it being noticeable.  So I had to have my sizes, or I wouldn't be getting a suit.  We went to Penney's (nothing in my size), Macy's (crowds and $$$), Lord & Taylor ($$$ and limited selection), and even Sears (nothing in my size).  I grew very frustrated, and finally just gave up.

We drove up to the Ellicott City Kohl's.  Wow, what a terrible parking lot!  I think there is a stop sign for every ten feet, and just about every parking space was being use.  Again, why is everyone inside shopping on the first day of Summer Break?  Kohl's limited selection of suits, plus their limited sizes, left me without a suit.

I'm going to try a few more places tomorrow, but I'm fast losing my patience and my opportunities to shop.  I may be out of luck if I strike out tomorrow.


I don't really like to trash talk, but I told my boss, an avid Nationals fan, that my Pirates were bringing the brooms and would be "sweeping" the Nats.  Little did I expect that the Bucs would completely collapse this weekend.  It was painful to watch AJ Burnett ("Batman") give up the most hits in a game for his entire career (14), while losing 4-1, with the Bucs offense somewhere lost at sea, on Friday, but then the Bucs were no-hit by the Max Scherzer-led Nats today!  The Bucs had just come off an 8-games winning streak leading into this series.  I rarely get to see the Bucs play in person unless I go to Pittsburgh, so with them in town to play the Nats, I was proudly wearing my Pirates jerseys.  That was a mistake.  The Nats fans, while not down and out mean like their Baltimore compatriots, made it difficult, anyway.  I'm glad the teams are not in the same division.  I'm going to be eating crow fed to me by my boss on Monday...

Have a great evening, everyone!

1 comment:

  1. I have a hard time finding my size at the Mall. I usually get my clothes at Marshall's, BJ's or Costco. For a suit, you might want to go to Men's Warehouse or whatever it is now. I haven't gotten a suit since I was married.